..sonnet 116..

let me not to the marriage of true minds
admit impediments. love is not love
which alters when it alteration finds,
or bends with the remover to remove:

o no! it is an ever-fixed mark
that looks on tempests and is never shaken;
it is the star to every wandering bark,
whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

love's not time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks,
within his bending sickle's compass come:
love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
but bear it out even to the edge of doom.

if this be error and upon me be proved,
i never writ, nor no man ever loved.

-william shakespeare

Friday, April 25, 2008

..before and after..

before and after my therapy :



..and my day was complete!

god bless!!
-guidance, over and out

..in her shoe..

rose feller said in the movie 'in her shoe' that :
"i get something out of them! when i feel bad i like to treat myself. clothes never look any good.. food just makes me fatter.. shoes always fit."

i couldn't agree more with her,
as a shoes lover,
i totally understand her statement.

i bought myself 3 pairs of shoes today;
a pair of boot,
a pair of open toe hill sandal,
a pair of court shoe,
and they made my world!!
for a while i forgot about the misery i have,
the sadness i hold within,
and get to indulge in its temptation,
god, it's a beautiful feeling!!

thank you allah for the gift of these feet,
at least i can wear those shoes,

god bless!!
-guidance, over and out

..the lunch..

i had lunch at sushi king today,
and it's my first time (pathetic, i know),
but hey, there's a first time in everything.

i had chicken something something..(i don't remember the name),
and tuna,
and the egg-whatever-the-name-is,
it's delicious!!
and definitely there will be a second time,
and third,
and fourth,
and counting..

to my seven heavens,
let's sushi king!!

innocently waiting for my order to arrive

i think it's tuna, otherwise my bro won't take it

definitely tuna!!

this is the egg-whatever-the-name-is

this is what i had, the-chicken something-something

this is what my bro had, something to do with piri-piri chicken

my attempt to eat with chopstick = succeeded

we need those good bacteria for our stomach

i had FUN!!

god bless!!
-guidance, over and out

..rendezvous with izu..

how flattered can you be if someone took leave from work to spend their time with you..?
how would you feel if someone take time out of their super duper hectic schedule so that they can have breakfast with you, catch a movie with you, or maybe later on go shopping with you..?

that was what my brother did.
i consider i'm blessed to have him as my brother (not because he took leave, i'm just grateful)
earlier today, we had breakfast together (he succeeded in waking me up,that's why..)
then after the friday prayer we were off to sunway pyramid to have lunch together, catch a movie together and finally...s.h.o.p.p.i.n.g..together.
i emphasize a lot on "together",don't i?
it's because i RARELY have the chance to hang out with my bro,
he is too busy.
that would explain why today i reached the state of euphoria!!
spending time with him,
despite of what we do,
where we go,
who we meet,
is a moment i'm looking forward to and always cherish.

after all,
it's not what you do,
it's who you do it with!!

thank you izu,
i love you
..more than words could say.

god bless!!
-guidance, over and out

Wednesday, April 23, 2008


yes, that is currently my condition.
my exam results were out last monday,
it didn't turn out the way i expected it to be,
it was worse.
my brother consoled me by saying "it's not the end of the world",
i nodded,
but deep down inside,
i felt like i was "at world's end".
something within me died that night,
but i can't figure what,
the same feeling i had when i was hurt!!
i was blank for a while,
didn't talk a lot,
didn't move a lot,
didn't think a lot,
but my mind was wandering,
wonder where it went.
i know in a situation like this,
one should bounce back from one's misery,
but somehow,
i kinda lost the will to do so.

at the moment,
i am picking my pieces one at a time,
slowly.. but surely to be whole again.

i keep saying to myself,
things will get better,
i just need to work harder ( i thought i did ),
for i don't know what the future holds for me.

god bless!!
-guidance, over and out


cambridge advance learners dictionary describes "responsibility" as "something that it is your job or duty to deal with".

out of three classes i had today, two were dealing with this matter.
which part of "be responsible" can't certain people understand..?
in eap class today, a classmate failed to submit the outline, and the person has been absent for god knows how many classes, and still can act like there is nothing happen. no initiative to see the lecturer, explain their disappearance from class, give the mc whatsoever.. nothing at all!! luckily, this person came to class today, the others are untraceable!!
i know this because the lecturer keep asking us about these people.
i always wonder how are these kind of people live their life..? without the sense of responsibility. ok, maybe they are responsible in other things, but what makes their study excluded from the list..? as a student, isn't taking care of your study a major part of you..? if you do not want to take the course, please drop it for others who really wanna graduate to take it. let elle take it, she deserves to be in your place! and because of this group of people, the lecturer was mad at the rest of the class.

same thing happened in my amlit class, only this time, it was about presentation, some groups came unprepared.
though the lecturer did not seem to be upset, who knows what goes on her mind.. one person's fault may jeopardize everything.
how do student take responsibility actually..?
do they take it seriously..? or lightly..?
do they know that all of these responsibilities are to prepare them for the real world..?
how many of them really completing the given task by heart..?
what does it like to be an irresponsible person actually..?
there is a saying that reads "don't take life too seriously, you'll never get out of it alive", but do we need to take everything lightly..?
must we neglect our responsibilities..? so we can be less serious about many things, thus, get out of our life, alive..?
what will we bring out of our life then if we never take responsibility..? will we have anything to be proud of..? hmmm...

in every role we play, there is a responsibility attached to it, take care of it for we will be questioned about it later. and remember, if you can't handle the workload, do not take it in the first place, do not bite of more than you can chew.

god bless!!
-guidance, over and out

..my state of mind..

this piece of writing is dedicated to my beloved brother;izu, my seven heavens;ina, sue, elle, kakcik, amir, and baby, (there are only 6 because i am the 7th), ayat, mas and kak fynn - these people have inspired me to write, thus, keeping this blog alive. thank you guyz!!

where do i begin..?
frankly speaking,
i am not the kind who shares what goes on my mind with everybody,
i choose to whom i voice everything,
and this is clearly why people like me,
or precisely me,
do not have a blog,
or friendster,
or myspace,
or whatever do people have nowadays,
maybe because i am a secretive person,
maybe because i lead a normal life,
i have nothing interesting to share with others..
but i guess that is about to change,
starting 2008,
i am going to be a new irda,
i will try to be less complicated (please pray this happens),
more "let go, let flow" kinda person,
less caring person (trust me, it's for the best),
i care too much before that i ended up having my heart broken over and over again!!
and i am going to keep this blog (it's a huge step for me, those who understand me know why is it so..),
in what form i am going to post my state of mind is still undecided,
i wish i could write beautiful poetry like kak fynn, like mas,
or write critically like my seven heavens,
or write freely like my izu and ayat,
i do not know yet..
one thing for sure,
i will write from the heart,
and there,
stand my conclusion.

god bless!!
-guidance, over and out


out of the night that covers me,
black as the pit from pole to pole,
i thank whatever gods may be,
for my unconquerable soul.

in the fell clutch of circumstance,
i have not winced nor cried aloud.
under the bludgeonings of chance,
my head is bloody, but unbowed.

beyond this place of wrath and tears,
looms but the horror of the shade,
and yet the menace of the years
finds, and shall find me, unafraid.

it matters not how straight the gate,
how charged with punishments the scroll,
i am the master of my fate;
i am the captain of my soul.

obviously, i don't write this poem. it is from william earnest henley.
this poem inspires me in some ways only i understand.
this poem was recited by lucas scott in one of the episode of one tree hill, it is meaningful to the heart that gets what it's trying to say, so, if you are not getting it, dig deeper, it's there somewhere..

i am the master of my fate,
i am the captain of my soul,
i am invictus!!

god bless!!
-guidance, over and out